U. S. Soldiers Home, Washington: during a century of travel (well 78 years!) both in and out of service I have travelled to over 150 countries (I count both North and South Dakota as countries) and for some reason have jotted signs and happenings that I thought funny at the time (and now wonder why). So here is the perfect opportunity to share some of my anecdotes.

In the India train schedule they have all these comments on leprosy.

1. Deformity does not mean infectivity.

2. Leprosy affects all faiths (Me. Surely not Catholics)

3. Any doctor can treat leprosy

(I have three suitcases full of notes I have taken about travel, military, yes, three suitcases. I have to get rid of some of the notes. Guess where I am sending them? Ha!

One Sign in restaurant: do not spit

Do not make nuisance

(Indians use this word nuisance often in their signs. Always reminding you to not make a nuisance of yourself (bad form)

One sign reads Deshi chicken eggs 20 rupees

English eggs 12 rupees

I was told English eggs mean the chickens were imported from England. Perhaps the eggs are smaller than Indian chickens.

They have a neat way of presenting your bill in Indian restaurants (even budget ones.) It is put in a folder that looks like a leather stationary folder which you open to look at the bill and no one else can see the amount of your bill. You then put the money in the stationary folder and close it. If you are host no one sees the bill and also they don’t see how little you leave as a tip inside the folder. I, of course like the system.

Sign in store: Vacancy for peon.

The different color turbans the Sikhs wear have no religious significance or other meaning. They can wear whatever color they wish. The man telling me this said he was wearing a black one because he was wearing a black suit.

Next month, Mac discusses Kenya. If you would like to contact Mac, he can be e-mailed on: macsan400@yahoo.com

What is it: rabies is an acute, and occasionally fatal virus almost always transmitted by dogs, jackals, foxes, skunks, cats, bats, mongooses, and farm animals. Rabies is found on all continents, except Antarctica and Australasia. Doctors have estimated that 2% of dogs in Bangkok are rabid – no, the Beetle did not know that either.

How do I get it: the rabies virus is transmitted in the saliva of an infected animal by biting or licking an open wound. The virus is usually carried by Half of all people bitten by an infected animal will develop rabies.

What happens if I get it: it can take weeks, months and sometimes years to develop, although the usual incubation time is 2 to 8 weeks. Symptoms can include loss of appetite, muscle aches, sore throat, headache, paralysis, spasms of swallowing muscles, delirium, convulsion, and, in worse cases, coma and death. Sometimes, odd behaviours manifest themselves in the form of aggression, agitation or anxiety

Diagnose and treatment: samples of saliva and blood will determine rabies. A course of rabies vaccinations will cure you. A pre-exposure vaccine is available for travelers visiting high risk countries. Seek medical help as soon as you have been bitten. The earlier you can receive rabies injections, the better, even if you have received a pre-exposure course of injections.

How can I avoid contracting rabies: if you are visiting a high risk area, arrange to have rabies vaccinations. In any case, avoid contact with all animals, whether domestic or wild. If you are bitten, wash the bite with soap and water and then with alcohol or iodine to reduce the chances of becoming infected.

After her memorable barbecue in Itaunas, Brazil, Iris and her overland group make their way to Caravelas.

We moved on to a place called Caravelas which was right by the sea, a nice little Pousada (hotel) as they call them in Brazil, with a little dip pool and nice little rooms, with the sea just seconds away. It was here that I decided to get rid of a load of outstanding postcards and so took a trip into the little town to find a post office and send them off. I do hope they all arrived safely because I was advised it might be better to wait until Salvador as rural post offices are notoriously sleepy places, but when I got to the post office, I found it very efficient and the staff of two extremely helpful, and I was able to get directions to a stationery shop so that I could buy more envelopes to post off the rest of my postcards at a later date.

I dare say recipients who receive the postcards initially noticed that the envelopes were stuck down with sellotape in a very haphazard fashion! Well, it was only after I had bought the envelopes and came to stick them down that I realized there was no sticky on them! Apparently this is the norm in Brazil and one has to either buy a glue stick to stick them down or use the facilities at the post office! We have decided that this is probably because it is so humid in Brazil that any sticky on the envelopes would soon deteriorate and stick themselves down before they were used, if you see what I mean.

We stayed in Caravelas for just two nights and then moved on to Caraiva, which is a small island just the most incredibly small boat journey from the shore, it took the boatsmen all of two minutes, I would think to row us across. And this again was an unspoilt place with no built up roads, and the island itself was on a coast line which was reached only by a very basic mud track road which sent us all lurching and bumping around inside the truck as it negotiated potholes, ruts and ridges in the road and at times had difficulty getting through narrow openings and sharp bends and some bridges that looked as if they wouldn't take a horse and cart, let alone an enormous truck!

Anyway, we spent an enjoyable three nights there. I wasn't prepared to enjoy it to begin with because we had such a trek round the island to find our accommodation only to find the place we were supposed to stay at was inexplicably closed, and so it was a race to find the best accommodation available and as usual, Judith and I got left behind in the crush and rush by the younger members of the group to get themselves sorted (there’s no concession on this trip for the aged among them) and so in the end it meant that we were housed in a small Pousada across the road from the rest of the group, but we did pay Reais 5 less than they did per night and got a really nice two-bedded (one double bed and one single bed) room and it took us quite some time to assure our landlord that Martin, who had come to act as interpreter for us, didn't want to share the double bed with one or both of us!)

We also found our landlord had donkeys who came by to spend the night just outside the grounds of the Pousada in a square area formed between two buildings. During the evening, we went to the landlord’s restaurant for a meal and noticed the gate to the Pousada and its grounds had been shut, so we carefully closed it behind us. We met a Brazilian lady at the restaurant, who seeing our difficulty with the menu, came to assist us. It turned out she had spent time in USA and spoke really good English and she turned out to be an artist of sorts, her speciality being designing patterns for materials, and her husband’s speciality was making jewellery and they travelled around on public transport selling their wares. We spent a pleasant evening with them before going back to bed, and then as I looked out over the grounds, once we had got to our room, I noticed we had inadvertently left the gate open and the donkeys, who had arrived to spend the night in the lee of the buildings, had entered the garden and were about to feed off the plants! Well, some of my friends and family know I am not too happy dealing with large animals, but without thinking I went straight down and shooed these three big animals out of the garden and they obeyed me so willingly, I felt quite proud of myself as I closed the gate behind them. (I didn't want to have to pay for all the plants they might have eaten and that spurred me on, I think)

We spent a pleasant couple of days in Caraiva, exploring the beaches and finding everyone so friendly and helpful. Most of the group descended on a particular restaurant for breakfast and to spend the day there while they frolicked on the beach and in the sea, and I just wandered from place to place, studying my Spanish and just contemplating the ocean. There were plenty of places to eat in the evening, mostly serving fish, and we met our Brazilian friends each evening and spent some pleasant times with them. They were in Caraiva to display their wares, and weren't too hopeful of selling much as they were relatively expensive compared to the normal tourist junk, but the lady was just pleased to practice her English and we were relieved because we weren't too keen to learn Portuguese. I had studied it a year or so ago, but I had then decided to concentrate on Spanish and so forgot most of what I had tried to learn!

We then went on to a place called Porto Seguro, which is in the middle of the mining area of Brazil where many precious stones and metals are found and whilst there visited their museum with exhibits from all over the world depicting stones in their raw state and in their polished state, and showing all the various minerals and metals extracted in the region together with the machinery etc to do it with and it truly was a very fascinating exhibition and I spent a couple of hours there. Porto Seguro is an unspoilt town with narrow streets and colonial buildings, unfortunately many of them in bad need of renovation, but it also made a pleasant stopping point for us on the way to Salvador.

Plenty of news about our friends Ryanair.

Despite their difficulties with court cases with the European Union about state aid, (whether Ryanair received unfair state subsidies at its Belgian hub of Charleroi) Ryanair has announced two new European bases in Rome and Barcelona. The new bases would start from January 28 and February 5 2004 respectively, adding 12 routes to its rapidly expanding network.

And the bad news: Ryanair is to close all its recently-opened intra-Nordic routes due to weak demand and switch capacity to destinations outside the region. They plan to end flights from Sweden’s Skavsta to Oslo in Norway, Tampere in Finland and Arhus in Denmark from January 14 2004. Ryanair added in a statement it was also shutting its flights from London to Ostend in Belgium, Maastricht in the Netherlands and to the French destinations of Reims and Clermont.

The good news: new routes will be from London Stansted to Linz in Austria, Bari in Italy, Erfurt in Germany, Jerez in Spain, and from France’s Charleroi to Calladolid in Spain.

You really wanted to know this, didn’t you: you can now buy Ryanair gift vouchers: for more info, see: http://www.ryanairvouchers.com/They say you can choose from 135 routes across 16 different countries (does that include flying into the wrong country – Beetle?) and that for every voucher bought Ryanair will make a £1/€1 donation to charity

Rank Country (GDP per capita)

1. Luxembourg ($36,400)
2. United States ($36,200)
3. Bermuda ($33,000)
4. San Marino ($32,000)
5. Switzerland ($28,600)
6. Aruba ($28,000)
7. Norway ($27,700)
8. Monaco ($27,000)
9. Singapore ($26,500)
10. Denmark ($25,500)

Trevor from the UK writes to tell us of his experience booking flights through the internet based travel company lastminute.com. He says:

Be very careful before booking flights through lastminute.com. I recently booked two flights a week or two in advance of travelling and elected to collect my tickets via the e-ticket mechanism. My account was duly debited for two tickets and I received confirmation to the effect that the e-tickets had been issued. So far so good. We then arrived at the airline check-in desk on the morning we were due to fly only to be told by the airline that they only had one e-ticket on the system and had no record of a second e-ticket ever being issued.

We were unable to contact lastminute.com (the only obvious way of contacting anyone at lastminute.com seems to be via an online web form) and we were faced with the choice of either;

A] Abandon our holiday

B] Pay the airline to issue the other e-ticket

C] Go by myself and leave my wife in England [ just kidding… 🙂 ]

We took option [B] and I contacted lastminute.com to obtain an explanation and a refund for the second e-ticket that we were charged for but never received. I received an email informing me that my wife’s name was too long (longer than a piece of string, presumably) and so they hadn't issued the second e-ticket. No explanation as to why I hadn't been informed of a problem prior to turning up at the airport, or even an apology. The best they could offer was to “request a refund via the airline on [our] behalf”.

We're still waiting for our money, and I'm now considering legal action.

Caveat emptor, as they say.

If you want to contact Trevor, he can be e-mailed on: trev_gs@blueyonder.co.uk

Mac has been reading and researching again! The following travel tips are a culmination of his recent reading.

Luggage tags: these can easily be lost. One potential solution is to put your address inside your suitcase or to put some distinctive marking with a permanent marking pen on the side of the suitcase, such as a circle, or triangle. On that advice, I have put a big cross on each area of my baggage. I hope someone will think maybe there is religious stuff inside, that I am a missionary or something and won’t steal my naughty magazines inside. (Only kidding!)

Getting lost – directions: one person suggested when you go to theme parks or such like, he goes to the right, then to the left and so on and return in reverse. Now why didn’t I think of that! (Globetrotters membership Secretary Kevin takes his compass with him on his trips to Japan to ensure that he exits subways in the right direction.)

Showers: if you don’t have shower clogs, one person suggests putting a hand towel on the bottom of shower tray and standing on it . Another person suggests that when you enter your hotel room you should turn on the shower for a few minutes which will get rid of the build up of spores that cause Legionnaires disease.

Taxis: one person suggested on leaving a taxi, to leave the door open while you are getting your bags out of the boot/trunk., this way the taxi can’t drive off before you have had a chance to make sure you haven’t left anything behind.

Travel on Sundays: I often travel on Sunday but one person recommends not travelling on Sundays as most train and bus times are infrequent or destinations are limited and many stores and businesses close early or are not open, such as money changers.

If you would like to contact Mac, he is happy to answer e-mails: macsan400@yahoo.com

Sally is British and has lived in the UK all her life. International travel as part of her work took her to many countries, including Portugal. She fell in love with the place and decided to sell her beautiful cottage in Malmsbury, Wiltshire, and relocate to Lisbon. In this article, she tells us of getting her first job.

I have started work (about time most of you are probably saying!) this month. I am teaching at a local international school (20 minutes by car) which is great fun. The headmistress has decided that the playground assistants, gardener, porter, cleaners and security staff should all learn English so that they can communicate better with the kids and parents. I have two classes each Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings. The age range is between mid twenties to late fifties. Two cannot read or write! I have one Romanian (who doesn’t read or write), and three Ukrainians (one is a qualified engineer working as the gardener, and one is an Economist working as a cleaner). It is great fun and very challenging as I don’t use a text book because I have to verbalise and visualise everything due to the non reading and writing element. On Monday I took them all around the grounds of the school identifying objects – they love “small wheelie bin” and “shed”.

Pronunciation is tricky and the word “fork” does tend to sound like something else! Tomorrow they have asked for phrases to use in the playground i.e. “shut up”, “sit down”, “what have you got there?” etc etc and the cleaners want their cleaning equipment identified. They can now introduce each other, say who they are, where they live and what they live in, whether they are married or single, how many children they have and how many pets – not bad in three weeks.

I have also just had an interview with a language school in Sintra and hope something might come from that and have another one scheduled for Thursday afternoon with a school about 15 minutes from here – so things might be looking up. I am also going to advertise English conversation classes to see what comes from that.

I have joined the IWP – the International Women of Portugal. I though it might be a good way of meeting new people. I duly trotted along to one of their coffee mornings and wondered whether it had been worth bothering. Most of the ladies grabbed a coffee and bun and headed off in groups – not quite what I had been expecting.

One lady did come over and talk and it turned out that her husband worked in the power industry over here, which was a coincidence as it turns out I spoke to him about two years ago when I was headhunting with my friend Cathy! What a small world! Anyway, she invited me over to her house for coffee a few weeks later which was rather nice.

Still not too convinced it’s the right thing to belong to, but I will persevere a bit longer. I have also, via an advert in their magazine, found a brilliant library. It is run by a lady who has converted what were maids quarters at the back of her villa into this gem of a place. There are three sections, large print, hardback and paperback – over 1,000 in total! And it’s all free. She will not take any money for anything. It’s brilliant for getting rid of unwanted paperbacks, tapes, videos etc. She has also got a very good selection of audio tapes. Just listened to second Harry Potter spoken by Stephen Fry which was fabulous and the Alan Bennett “Talking Heads”. I met two very interesting ladies there and have lunch with them at weekends. One of them has lived here for 40 years – she was married to a Portuguese artist and lives in a wonderful old villa with three rescued cats and three dippy dogs. The other lady is fascinating. She used to answer the problem letters in various teenage magazines in the sixties, typed scripts for someone who made blue movies and is quite a character – very strong minded and incredibly opinionated which is a bit difficult at times!

I gave my classes homework for the first time on Wednesday and apart from about two small spelling errors, they got everything right! I am so thrilled. I have also been told by the headmistress that they love the classes – makes me feel quite proud. Our final topic of the day today (25 September) was “what are you doing at the weekend?” We had the usual things like going to the supermarket, sleeping, watching Benfica on TV, celebrating 3^rd wedding anniversary (he got a round of applause) and then with a bit of giggling and translating we had the classic: “On Saturday I am going to the supermarket to do the shopping. I am going to make love on Saturday night”. This got cheers! They really are a great bunch of ladies and gents!

That’s fine. You could also add that I am now working for Big Ben in Cacem teaching three children aged from 6-8 and two adults in their late twenties. The biggest problem with the adults is that they hate the text books they have been given because they are aimed at children. I am trying to devise something of more interest and relevance to them.

Oh and there has been a recount at the library – Jennie reckons there are now over 5,000 books!

If you’d like to contact Sally, she can be reached by e-mail on: pethybs@hotmail.com

The UK Government think-tank Commission for Integrated Transport is currently considering a plan to impose a congestion charge on flights. It warns that the number of flights is growing by five per cent annually from the present figure of 162 million a year. Ten years ago, planes caused 3.5 per cent of man-made greenhouse gases in the world. By 2050, this figure is estimated to rise to 15 per cent.

The toll, to be introduced on flights leaving at the most popular times, could double the amount travellers pay in the UK on departure tax, which currently stands at between £5 and £40. The charge is being considered to raise an extra £600 million to offset the damage aircraft is causing to the environment.

Airlines in Britain already pay £800 million to offset the damage they cause. The commission says they should be paying £1.4 billion for congestion charges on mid-morning or early evening flights. UK airlines have dismissed the proposal, saying passengers were already taxed enough. British Airways said: 'The way to relieve congestion is to meet demand and that means extra runways.' Holiday operator Thomas Cook added: 'Passengers are already being taxed enough.'