U. S. Soldiers Home Mac: during a century of travel (well 78 years!) both in and out of service I have travelled to over 150 countries (I count both North and South Dakota as countries) and for some reason have jotted signs and happenings that I thought funny at the time (and now wonder why). So here is the perfect opportunity to share some of my anecdotes.

I stayed in Hotel Blue in Delhi (avoid it.) Actually OK but basic and the police were constantly checking the place as so many of the clients were young people travelling the world for years and didn’t have any work (except temporary jobs). There was a young German travelling around the world on a motorcycle. He was born after Hitler was dead. He told me he was in Egypt and when an elderly Egyptian heard he was from Germany said to him. “Hitler is a good man. How old is he now? This broke up the young German. Some people never get the word. Indian police came up to the hotel looking for illegal immigrants and the young German disappeared.

While waiting for a room in New Delhi at the Hotel Ashok Yatri News $10 US a day (it seemed to be a budget hotel ran by the government and I liked it) I went into the public toilet in the lobby and took all my luggage into the stall with me. When I went to leave stall I had trouble getting the door open as my luggage was in the way. As I struggled out, I saw an Indian at the washbasin watching my antics. I told him. “I spent the night in there – couldn’t get a room. Without batting an eye he said “You did not have to do that”

Puri, India. Stayed at Z Hotel. That is the entire name of hotel or as the British say zed for Z I think. Z hotel is on Chakraateertha Road. A short name for hotel. Long name for road. It is on the beach next to the ocean. The hotel was a palace of a very minor Maharaja of a very minor state in West Bengal. I was offered a complimentary drink as I signed in. All this for 480 rupees ($4.80 U.S. a night.) You can walk to fishing villages with palm huts a short way from hotel. When I went to see the fishermen bring in the fish at 4PM, a little boy ran ahead of me to point out the faeces on the beach (the fishermen use the beach as a toilet). He would point and say Toilet. He was constantly saying Toilet, toilet, toilet so I would not step into the faeces.

At the Konark Temple in India where they have erotic carvings of men and women doing things in almost impossible gymnastic positions a little boy appointed himself as my guide. This ten year old guide solemnly informed me. “There are sixty four approaches.”

Madras, India. Diana had read that the bicycle rickshaw drivers in front of train station would often take you to a hotel where they got a commission instead of the hotel you requested. She told me to give the address of a landmark near the hotel you wished. Tell him you want to go to Star Theater (which was near Broadlawn Hotel I wanted) I said Star Theater please and he replied. “Oh the Broadlawn Hotel!” I moved from there to Himalayan Hotel that Dianna kept calling the Everest.

The Fairlawn Hotel in Calcutta is a hoot. It is run by an Albanian lady (I think) who had been married to a British Major, since died. She was more British than the British and she ran the hotel like they did in the days of the Raj. She had all the men servants wear colourful turbans although they were not Sikhs (I at first thought when they said someone was Sikh I thought they were saying they were sick.) When she was out of sight they would pull them off. She would walk around with a little poodle in her arms saying “And how are you my dear?’ Americans loved this but some Indians from America revisiting India told me that their daughter hated this.

I stayed in several hotels in New Delhi including YMCA and YWCA International Hotel (took both men and women) food very good there. In an Indian brochure I read “When our hearts are empty we collect things” (give me your things and sin no more.) It is true that we sometimes become slaves to our possessions. Give them away and travel!

Next month, Mac discusses animals. If you would like to contact Mac, he can be e-mailed on: macsan400@yahoo.com

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